Picking up the Pieces

Someone once told me that our lives begin as a solid piece of glass, and as we experience what life has to offer, it becomes scratched and broken, never to be whole again. At the time, I found that to be incredibly depressing - being an Aries, of course I wanted to be able to "wipe the slate clean" and start anew, with a brand new piece of glass.

As the years have passed, I've begun to see this in a different light. Every scratch, every break in the glass shapes us, and makes us who we are - unique. Unlike anyone or anything else on the planet...and being an Aries, I liked being unique, so this sat with me pretty well - until yesterday.

Yesterday, a hammer that would have made Thor proud smashed into my pane of glass and broke it into so many pieces that I feel as though I have lost parts of myself in the carnage. I feel hollow, empty - as if the echoes of life have left the building. What do you have when your pane of glass is now a heap of rubble?

Well, for starters you tend to sit and stare at the rubble pile - a lot. I've found it hard to do anything else. You move some pieces around on the floor, pick out the bigger ones and brush the smaller slivers together. You find yourself thinking about what was lost, and what you've lost that you don't even realize you've lost yet...and worrying that when you do realize, it will be something important...something you may fear being without.

And you tend to cry for a while, lamenting the glass that used to be. And then you start to really look at what you have left, and face what the glass now is. And it isn't easy to face, but being an Aries I want to move forward, ever forward head first into the fray.

So, I've decided to make a mosaic of my glass pane - I'm going to make something beautiful from the chaos on the floor, and I'm going to be able to look at it and know that it's me, and that it's okay. That I'm okay. I'm just a little different inside than I was before. A little sadder, somewhat wiser, and maybe even stronger.

And I'm going to buy a lot of glue...